You Owe Me, Kid
This morning I sneaked a bite of my son’s bagel. When he caught me he said, “Come on, Mom! You owe me!”
I owe him? I OWE him?
“Breathe,” I said.
He looked at me as if I were an idiot.
“Did you breathe?”
Eye roll, shrug, head shake. “Yeah.”
“You owe ME.”
by Lela Davidson on May 28, 2010
in motherhood, Rugrats, Tweens, & Other Offspring
That is the point at which my mom would have said one of her favorite phrases: “I brought you into this world…and I can take you out.”
When my daughter has moments such as these, I generally remind her that her head was stuck in my nether regions for the better part of two hours. So really? I can do whatever the hell I please to her. She doesn’t enjoy that very much. But, I didn’t enjoy her gigantic melon being lodged in my body, so you know.
My mom would have just considered the bagel bite as a down payment on my club foot, but she was really sentimental. She used to say: “When they made you, they broke the mold.” By which she meant: “When she made me, I broke the mold.”