Pass the Bubbly: Kirk, Michael, and Me
One of my favorite things to do on this blog is introduce you to other writers. (And then hope you’ll still love me best!) I’d do it more often if I didn’t get lost for half a day doing it.
Candance, the Crazy Texas Mommy is like an outspoken Jill Connor Browne (the Sweet Potato Queen), Jessica Bern needs to move here so we can be friends and tape the Real Housewives of Benton County (you SO don’t have to be a housewife to be on that show), Coffee House Mom is like a nice version of me who will probably take over all my local print gigs when I finally round the bend and just start peppering everything with expletives, and without Mary Ann’s encouragement, I think I’d still be filling out IRS Form 1120S.
It’s hard not to love a Crazy Texas Mommy, especially one who open admits to lusting after Kirk Cameron:
Now that Kirk Cameron loves Jesus a whole lot, I wonder if lusting him is okay? I swear he doesn’t age. But I don’t lust him anymore. He’s too pure and I’d feel guilty hanging out with him cause I’m all not pure and then I’d feel like he was judging me and shit and I’d be like, “Why all you Christian people gotta be all judgy all the time?” and he’d be like, “Why are you talking like you’re from the ghetto?” and I’d be like, “Cause that’s where I live, Bitch.” Then we’d break up but he’d pray for me, I think. Anyway, that kind of religious experience will give people a skewed perspective of the world.
Say, say, say what you want about Jacko, but you have to admit he made great music. And as we mourn, Jessica Bern reminds us that something good always comes from tragedy:
You see, in my mind something wonderful has come from this tragedy and that is, at least for now, whenever I pull up to a red light singing Billy Jean is not my Lover, I don’t get people looking at me, wanting to scream,”Hey lady! The 80’s called, they want their music back!”
NWA writer, Coffee House Mom, considers the ever-perplexing guest ammenties issue:
And what about those fancy towels in the bathroom? Perhaps I need to check with the etiquette rules of Emily Post, but am I to wipe my wet hands on the towel wrapped in delicate ribbon – or search for another? Was my upbringing really that uncouth – that I’m so awkward around such finery?
And for all of you who’ve asked, “How was the writing thing? You went to some writing thing, didn’t you?” to which I’ve answered, “It was great”, Mary Ann says it better:
We weren’t sure what to expect when we got there. The classes were only scheduled to last four hours per day. What would we do with ourselves? So we concocted this dream world where we went to class, hung out at the pool, did our toenails, put the green facial goo on our faces, and got spiffied up for long leisurely dinners with the other writers in the evenings.
Yeah… it was so totally not like that. But it was better. And now, if you’ll excuse me, the novel awaits.
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by Lela Davidson on June 30, 2009
in Random Amusements
I still love you the best.
Thank you so much for the shout out!! Okay, the “outspoken Jill Connor Browne” thing made me squeal, “She called me a Sweet Potato Queen!! Shut up!!” I was alone, though, so it didn’t really have the intended effect. Anyway, huge, huge compliment, Lady!! Thanks!
I did love the Kirk Cameron. He was so cute and smart assy on “Growing Pains” and, we had the same birthday, which made me squeal when I read it in my Tiger Beat magazine. Obviously, he’s much older than me. But, yeah, he’s too pure. I can’t deal with it.
Maybe we should have worn the green goo while we jogged;)
Well, flattery will indeed get you anywhere. I’m surprised – and honored -that you would mention me on your fabulous site. I may be a “nicer” version, but I’m not nearly as funny.
If you were less nice, you’d be more funny. It’s a trade off.
And I would like to know just where flattery will get me, because my guest room needs dusting…
HelOOOOO! Now you think of that. We would have made a pretty picture jogging around downtown Tulsa in mud masks. That would’ve given OTHERS something to write about.
You’re so sweet. I really do think you ought to get yourself cast on RH? You might be the first *real* one they’d get.